to be human

every day i become more and more aware of my humanity. a temporary existence though it may be, it is still my existence and i want to cherish it as unreservedly as i can.

i don’t really know where to begin tonight or if i should begin at all.

what greatness can i not accomplish if only i would shut my trap every now and again?

body issues, sex issues, patience issues. these are the “troubles” of today and yet, none of them hold me back from tomorrow. tomorrow will come and i will embrace it as best i can. i will embrace tomorrow with the willingness to work through those things of which i cannot release my hold and hope the universe will help push me along.

so many things that reveal to me my humanity are the things i so often loathe. although i think it silly to assume anyone would care to admit their pride, i really take issue with it some days. some days it is more than difficult to look into the mirror knowing i am frustrated with not being more, with not having the power to change with a blink or a twitch.

and yet, these are the things that keep me laughing and moving along in life.

who cares to admit those dark pockets are sometimes cozy and soft and warm? and yet, i’m okay with admitting it today, and with talking about it, because when i can get it out, i can laugh.

i love my life today though i don’t always enjoy every aspect.

that blonde-haired, green(blue? hazel?)-eyed woman was the spirit of the universe in flesh for me today. i don’t know what it was, but i looked at her differently tonight. tonight, something changed. and i am so glad she’s a part of my life.

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~ by Elle on May 11, 2009.

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